let's cause a scene

you should've known by now you were on my list
  • Gf: babe come over
  • Me: I'm eating garlic bread
  • Gf: I'm horny and my parents aren't home
  • Me: it's the kind that's covered in cheese
letsblameitonthedevil:

loyaltonothingexceptthedream:

fuckityfucktardunicorn:

lizthefangirl:

talithalungbarrow:

hopelesshoneyxo:

nataliesgrotto:

let’s take a minute and realize how heavy that train must have been.

Well considering how heavy her hair used to be, that trail would be rather easy, don’t you think?

What if the train is exactly as long as her hair was?

oH COME O N DISNEY

Just think, after years of being weighed down by like 60ft of hair and to suddenly have it all gone? She’s going to have major balance problems after that and afterwards be really fast.

Is no one going to talk about the horse just hanging out in church?

he’s not “just hanging out” he’s the ringbearer

letsblameitonthedevil:

loyaltonothingexceptthedream:

fuckityfucktardunicorn:

lizthefangirl:

talithalungbarrow:

hopelesshoneyxo:

nataliesgrotto:

let’s take a minute and realize how heavy that train must have been.

Well considering how heavy her hair used to be, that trail would be rather easy, don’t you think?

What if the train is exactly as long as her hair was?

oH COME O N DISNEY

Just think, after years of being weighed down by like 60ft of hair and to suddenly have it all gone? She’s going to have major balance problems after that and afterwards be really fast.

Is no one going to talk about the horse just hanging out in church?

he’s not “just hanging out” he’s the ringbearer

(Source: disneyismyescape, via babycastle09)

deanwinchestire:

I found an unopened pack of Batman silly bands so I opened them and I caN’T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE HE’S DANCING

image

slide to the right

image

slide to the left

image

take it back now y’all

image

CHA CHA REAL SMOOTH

(via babycastle09)

knitmeapony:

egobus:

one time when I was about four, the 10 year old neighbour boys attacked me with water guns and when I ran away and told my mom she gave me the hose and set it to pressure wash and basically told me to finish what they started  

Excellent parenting.

(via babycastle09)

jackalqueenston:

i was sent to the school counselor after a teacher overheard me saying i had to murder all the other kids in the school with the same name as me so i could become the alpha

(Source: snarkys, via not-olesya)

x-file:

catazoid:

As promised, here are some pictures of Lyalya’s first walk outside! Look at the bushy little squirrel tail :D the sandpit was her favorite spot! She was extremely excited and threw sand all over the place

this is a fucking squirrel. this is a fucking squirrel with a cat’s head. who is responsible for this

(via babycastle09)

damnaveragesheep:

stripperina:

rachellgmh:

I love that these ladies basically sent these dudes howlers.

At work the other day, a customer tried to take a photo of myself and another dancer, which is explicitly against the rules of our club. I grabbed his phone out of his hand, deleted the pics, and then proceeded to text his parent’s mobile number a message that basically said “I’m at the stripclub and I tried to sneak a picture so now strippers have stolen my phone and are letting you so you know that I’m bad at respecting club rules.”

dude

damnaveragesheep:

stripperina:

rachellgmh:

I love that these ladies basically sent these dudes howlers.

At work the other day, a customer tried to take a photo of myself and another dancer, which is explicitly against the rules of our club. I grabbed his phone out of his hand, deleted the pics, and then proceeded to text his parent’s mobile number a message that basically said “I’m at the stripclub and I tried to sneak a picture so now strippers have stolen my phone and are letting you so you know that I’m bad at respecting club rules.”

dude

(Source: fivetail, via babycastle09)